Forever to be a Ratchet Hoe


In the past week I’ve seen the holy trinity of ratchetness. From Campbellton to Candler Road ratchetness is at a all time high this summer! We all like to laugh at videos and instances of people taking it to the extreme ratchet, but how many of you can honestly say that you don’t do shit just as ignorant on a regular basis? Making fun of girls who get pregnant, but you’ve had the “fuck once with a condom, after that we can go raw” mentality since high school. Accusing people of having funky attitudes, when you constantly eye roll, and respond to conflict with other women with “you look like–” insult jokes and to relationship drama with “sowhatsowhatsowhat!!! But you with me tho!” immaturity. Not all ratchets can easily be pointed out by the leopard print and drawn on eyebrows, and a lot of you calling someone else ratchet is like Akon cracking on Flava Flav for beingdarkskin. Look at your own life before you pile on someone else. You no longer have to be from the hood to be a hoodrat, it’s not just black girls. It’s a mentality that’s mimicked across races and class thanks to TV, music, and the internet. Basic Bitches talking about, “I got an Iphone and a Louie bag, get on my level” but they spray perfume on theircoochie, and call that a shower. Miss Book smart over in the UK is top of her class but she’s on the tube ready to fight because some Asian chick looked at her funny. And let’s not forget how ratchet white girls turned Mardi Gra into the hot mess it is today.

I said this before and I will say this again, you get the quality of man you deserve. Show a hoodrat anigga with a job and watch how quickly her pussy dries up. A dude working at H&R block, no kids, and driving an Altima has been trying to take you out to dinner for months, and you see him as thirsty. Let Reddz with the house arrest anklet, whose still serving rocks in front of his mother’s crib, say, “damn girl, bout time you getn’ ass”, and your heart skips a beat. One dude is telling you you’re pretty the other one is play wrestling with you because you got a smart mouth—we all know who’s going to get the pussy first. You’re attracted to basic men because you like to be treated basic.

Why do you always meet the wrong guys? Because you shop in the wrong fucking neighborhoods, hang at the wrong fucking clubs, and get hooked up by the wrong fucking friends. What were the odds that Kate Middleton was going to marry a nigganamed Deandre who had dreads, neck tats, and sold airbrushed Jordan’s out his car? 0%. Kate Middleton didn’t hang at the Slauson Swap Meet, she attended polo matches, garden party, and had a list of qualities that had to be met before she would even consider having tea with him. Million dollar pussy doesn’t downgrade, so I take it that 99% of y’all don’t believe your kitty has that kind of value.

Real love is letting you hit the blunt first. Real love is not pulling out. Real love is him using a condom with them other hoes. Real love is giving you back shots after you curse him out. Real love is putting five dollars in the gas tank. Real love is choking you after you like another nigga’s FB status. Real love is, “you know you my bitch… alright then, shut the fuck up.” There aren’t enough emoji’s in the world to describe the insane treatment that Hoodrats allow. You would think those that are so loud, matter-a-fact, and no nonsense would be—well, no nonsense. It’s all a front, ratchets act out, cry, say they deserve better, then run back to their basic boyfriends because the constant arguing and fighting is the only love they understand. If he’s angry that means he cares.

I believe that all women deserve to be Queens, but the problem is some of them fear sitting in a throne. There are thousands ofhoodrats who matured and grew out of that basic ass lifestyle, they don’t need to be seen, heard, or hang around a group of dudes to feel important. Those are the ones who have all kinds of stories about how wild they used to be, or remind you that they can “still bring the hood out” if needed, but keep it classy 90% of the time. Then there are the ones who continue to do hoodrat stuff with their friends because that’s the only life they understand. All girls do ratchet shit, usually admitting to the small infractions that can be viewed as cute. Few are willing to admit openly that they will do anything for attention, that they have inferiority complexes, or they’re over 25 and not only fucking with bums, but extremely attracted to those type of men. Honestly, you can’t try to check those girls because they’ll ask with hands clapping, “why you in my business tho I must be important!” or scream “you don’t even know me like that!” At the same time I can’t judge them because who has the right to tell a person to go against what makes them happy? Being someone’s bottom bitch gives them a purpose. Blow ups followed by makeup sex every other week, is their definition of romance. Supporting a grown man with her hard earned money makes her feel needed.

PS. If you’re reading this site for the first time because someone sent you this link…they‘re politly telling you that you’re ratchet. Get your life.


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